how to get more out of your shots: learning process reviewed

Ok, so as I wrote earlier, I have come up with an entirely new idea for the current dialogue exercise.
I gained a whole lot of insight at Ed Hooks' Masterclass and Bobby Beck's lecture while I was at FMX, so I wanted to share that as good as I can and tell you about the thought- and learning-process I was going through..
Ok, let's jump into it by looking at the first version of the shot I submitted:



I love that audio! It's full of energy, has great contrast between the two characters and is just plain entertaining. I wanted to get out of my comfort zone with this one and really push myself with my last exercise at Animation Mentor.
I wasn't happy with what I came up with as I submitted the layout pass. Two guys, with a desk between them, one is even sitting and the other barely moves during the whole piece? Come on! Where's the energy? But I wasn't able to put my malcontent in words.
Then came FMX and I've learned a ton there. Let's check it out:

Basic lessons learned by Ed Hooks and Bobby Beck:

1. Acting is doing!
The character needs to be doing something all the time. It's not like you have to let him jump around all the time though. Waiting is an action too! But then ask: "who is he waiting for?" A character waiting for a first date acts completely different from a character who's waiting for his girlfriend he is about to break up with!

2. The magic formula: Action ---/Obstacle/---> Objective
The character takes action in pursuit of an objective and is interrupted by an obstacle/conflict. There are three types of conflict:
- conflict with yourself
- conflict with the situation
- conflict with the other person

3. The scene takes place in the middle!: 
Know what the character was doing before your shot and what he/she will do after the cut.

4. Acting has almost nothing to do with words!
You can tell the audience one thing with words and show them another thing. What the audience sees overrides what they hear.

5. Goals of an animator:
- communicate your character to the audience
- make your character feel present in the scene

There's a lot more you could and should consider when thinking about your shot, but let's keep the list brief for the sake of easy reading. I'm currently reading Ed Hooks book and there's so much more info that will help you create better performances. Go get it!
Are you still with me?
Ok, let's go back to the clip above and cross check it with the list. The first and second points are more or less covered: Both characters have their objectives and obstacles (will describe them below), but it's provided by the audio and sort of given in this case. Number 3? I give away no context at all to what has happened before or will happen after.
Let's put 4 in other words: Turn off the sound and there should be a story unfolding on your screen. If it's not happening, you obviously failed to use your character to communicate a story or their character traits. It's just moving puppets to sound.
As for 5, they go along with the other points: As long the characters don't have an objective to follow, a story to tell, backstory and emotions, there's no way you can make the character feel present and real in a scene.

When I came up with the idea for the clip I wasn't aware of any of these things and just made up something random that felt like fun to animate. Now here's what I submitted after going over my notes and with the checklist in my mind:



First of all I wanted to come up with something that was up to par with the energy in the audio clip. So there should be movement and action in there.
Then I tried to describe the characters actions, objectives and obstacles:

Writer:
Action: write the script, get help from other scriptwriters
Objective: Write a great script, that satisfies producer, audience, critic and stands out as a piece of art
Obstacle: Can't find a middleway between producer/deadline and his artistic expectations

Producer:
Action: Delegate tasks (script to writer), organizing and overviewing the production
Objective: Get the movie done
Obstacle: Writer is unable to work in a production environment because he thinks he's an actual artist! can't work with people like this!

Point 2, check!
So I had this idea that there should be movement. And the characters' schedules and objectives are never in sync.. basically the writer is unable to keep up with the producers pace.
Movement. Unable to keep up with the producer.. see what I'm getting at? Easy! They are walking towards the producers office while discussing the writers work -Point 1, check-, and the producer sets the pace! Even without the audio we now can read this relationship clearly! Point 4, check! To stress the fact that the producer is in a stronger position than the writer, we put the scene into the building of the production company.
In the end the producer shuts the door in front of the writer. There's a producer tag on the door. So basically he shuts himself, he's not open to the writers suggestions anymore. The writer failed.

Guess we have covered points 1, 2 and 4 so far. But what's with 3 and 5? Aight, let's have a look at 3 first:
Even though we don't have an explicit indication about where they came from, the fact that they are quickly walking through the hallways gives us a sense of context. The producer looks like a man who's hard to get a hold of, so the writer might just had to wait for him to come out of the conference room and intercept him on the way to his office. The end is obvious: the producer is back in his office and keeps on being busy. Whereas the writer.. well he's going either home or straight into the next bar..
Opposing to this scenario, two men sitting in an office isn't exactly rich, right?

Point 5 seems like a culmination of the other points to me. If you managed to create a scene that contains those four points you will most likely be able to communicate your characters to the audience and the will feel present in the scene and context you've created.

Wow. This is easily the most elaborated post I've wrote so far. I surely went through a huge learning process during the last few days and I wanted to make shure I'll share my thoughts. Hope you enjoyed reading and could take something away for yourself. Let me know if I left anything open or unclear, or if you have anything you'd like to add.

And right back to work! Have fun!
C